As humans we are wired for seeking meaning in our lives. We look for opportunities to understand our place in this world through our work, relationships, hobbies, spirituality or connection to something larger than ourselves. “Researchers’ definitions of meaning in life typically incorporate three themes: the belief that your, life and contributions matter to others and yourself, the feeling that your life makes sense, and the feeling that you are actively pursuing fulfilling goals” (Hicks, & King). We get a great deal of comfort in believing that our lives and actions matter in the grand scheme of things.
Consequently, when we, or someone we love, encounter adversity, trauma or incredible suffering, it can feel impossible to find meaning in misfortune. This is often true for those with mental health challenges. People are left wondering, “why is this happening to me”? Finding meaning from their experiences can be fraught with complexity, confusion and avoidance. Struggling to understand why some of us are burdened with more hardship than others can be incredibly difficult. However, finding meaning in traumatic experiences can be powerful and transformative. But you might find yourself asking, how is this possible?
When you feel alone in your struggle, it’s hard to imagine that your pain could hold a greater meaning. History shows us innumerable examples of people who were able to transform their pain into action by connecting with others who faced similar experiences. Pull up any TedTalk and you are bound to hear stories of reconciliation and healing from hardship. For anyone who watches Saturday Night Live and is familiar with Darrell Hammond he grappled with severe mental illness and substance abuse throughout his life. He was able to channel his pain into an incredible career.*Side Note: I highly recommend his book: ‘God, If You’re Not Up There, I’m F*cked: Tales of Stand-Up, Saturday Night Live, and Other Mind-Altering Mayhem’. Other names that you might recognize: Michael Phelps, Jim Carrey, Mike Tyson, Simone Biles, Ophrah Winfrey. There are countless examples throughout history of people who have navigated their way through adversity, trauma and mental illness and shaped it into something powerful: writing, athletics, art, music and the like. This by no means negates these experiences, merely allows them to construct some meaning from it.
If we can find meaning in our experience, and allow it to be a catalyst for change, it can bring healing and a redefined sense of purpose. Take a moment to think back on a time in your life when things were going really well. Did that time or experience impact your way of thinking or result in any profound changes in yourself or how you view the world? Now think of a period that was fraught with challenges, loss, or extreme hardship. When you look back on those memories, which experience did you learn more from? Which experience shaped you as a person or made you more resilient? I’d venture to guess it was the time in your life when you faced adversity that made you stronger, more resilient or shaped you as a person. “Adversity challenges us to step out of our comfort zones, develop resilience, and discover our inner strengths. When we face adversity with a growth mindset, we become more adaptable and better equipped to handle future challenges” (Rathor).
I was recently out in California and saw the aftermath of the wildfires. It devastated the landscape; it was difficult to see all the dead trees and charred ground. However, I noticed shades of green and how quickly the undergrowth was spouting back to life. This is a poignant example of how the natural world is resilient in the face of disaster. Nature can show us how to find meaning in tragedy. Forest fires, while devastating, clear the land removing invasive species and yielding new growth, nourishing the soil and improving the habitat for wildlife. Certain plants need fire to germinate, triggering seed growth.
“Adversity often prompts us to reevaluate our priorities. It forces us to reflect on what truly matters in life. Many individuals who have faced life-threatening illnesses, for example, report a shift in their values, placing greater importance on relationships, health, and personal fulfillment” (Rathor).
Adversity is a reality of life. These moments can leave us feeling powerless and discouraged. However, we have a choice in how we respond to it, we don’t have to let it define us, we can use that adversity as a catalyst for insight and growth.
Resources:
Hicks, J., & King, L. (2021, November 2). Three Ways to See Meaning in Your Life. Greater Good Magazine. https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/three_ways_to_see_meaning_in_your_life
Rathor, R. (2023, September 3). Finding Meaning in Adversity: Transforming Challenges into Opportunities. Medium. https://medium.com/@ruchirathor_23436/finding-meaning-in-adversity-transforming-challenges-into-opportunities-e93122dc1962
